How to Develop Good Character: The Role of Culture

By CHARLES DEBELAK
Founder-in-Residence

This is the fifth installment of Mr. Debelak's Character Education series. This academic year, through essays and videos, Mr. Debelak will discuss Birchwood School of Hawken’s character education program, explaining what we mean by good character, why we place importance on character education, and how we carry out an effective program that gets results. A companion video to this essay is linked below.

In deriving principles for an effective character education program, we answer three questions:

1) What do we mean by good character?

2) Why is it important that schools construct a meaningful character education program?
 
3) How do we build a realistic and effective framework; what pieces are needed?
 
The “how” question includes three aspects – teaching, training and culture. Previously, I discussed teaching and training. Here I will discuss the role of culture.


The Role of Culture
 
Culture manifests the beliefs and aspirations of a community or an institution. It's created through a combination of purposefully determined components like beliefs, practices, and customs. Each component works in harmony with the others. Each plays an integral role.

Collectively they influence and inspire every member of the community toward the fulfillment of its beliefs and aspirations. A healthy culture, one that is aligned with the community’s mission, is the surest means of realizing the beliefs and aspirations of the community’s purpose and mission.

For example, a family culture, which aspires toward togetherness and harmony, will cultivate elements that build healthy relationships and mutual care. A school culture, which aspires toward academics and strong character, will focus on elements like goal setting, hard work, self-discipline and compassion.

The effect of a culture is powerful. When all the components operate, every member will be convinced and enabled to align his or her way of life in accordance with the community’s aspirations. 

The burden for creating a mission-aligned culture lays on the shoulders of the leaders and adults in the community. These individuals embody the beliefs of the culture and commit themselves to live in a manner that expresses those beliefs. 

Furthermore, these cultural leaders make it their responsibility to pass their values and customs to the next generation of community members. The adult leaders, collectively, uphold a way of life which bears a hidden influence upon all the members of the community. This is the cultural ethos. This ethos, like an invisible force, nudges every member in the direction of the community’s culture and the fulfillment of the mission. 

In the context of these essays on how to develop good character in children, I am naming a culture in which children grow, thrive and flourish according to innate potentials. In addition, I am naming a culture which encourages children to care for and serve others. Adults are the creators of this culture. 

At home it is the responsibility of parents. At school, the teachers are responsible.
How can we make this happen?
There are two sides to this effort. The first is external, determining the language, the practices and expectations for community behaviors. This includes customs and traditions which will reinforce the community’s culture. 

The second is internal and personal. This effort depends upon parents and teachers who commit themselves to the mission and culture. These family or school leaders should answer a “call” to become better people. This means they set goals for their personal growth and advancement; they set goals to enrich their support and service to others.

When parents or teachers are serious about their own growth as a human being, when they determine to become more virtuous in order to reach their goals, they will directly, often subtly and imperceptibly, influence the children around them. 

When adults set goals and practice to reach those goals – so, too, will children. When adults exercise compassion and seek to serve and support the people around them – so, too, will children. When adults live a life of gratitude and humility – so, too, will children. 

This is culture and it is powerful. It is always working upon those in our family or school. When combined with teaching and training, we give children a pathway to grow, thrive and flourish. 

View the companion video: "2024-25 Character Series – How: Through Culture"

Charles Debelak is Founder-in-Residence, along with his wife, Helene. Together, the Debelaks founded Birchwood in 1984. Mr. Debelak’s writing provides parents with information about sound educational principles and child development issues gleaned from history, contemporary research, and his 50-plus years of educating, coaching, and counseling children, young adults, and parents. This article appeared in the January 2025 edition of the school's monthly newsletter, "The Clipboard." 
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